Soon, It Won't Be Just Pretend
by Loki's-Phantom-x
Summary: 1st in my human!Castiel series. Dean finds Castiel injured, and does his best to help him. But when the angel confesses his love for the hunter, how will Dean react to the admission? Dean/Castiel eventually, boy kissing.
1. Chapter 1

**Soon, It Won't Be Just Pretend**

**Summary:** _1st in my human!Castiel series. Dean finds Castiel injured, and does his best to help him. But when the angel confesses his love for the hunter, how will Dean react to the admission? Dean/Castiel eventually, boy kissing._

**A/N**: _Sorry if there is any out of characterness ... italics are flashbacks. I also will be adding some angels into the story. I've done research on names and meanings, but if anything is wrong, let me know. Thanks x_

**A/N #2**: _This story is also 'This Fire In My Skin' but I have decided to re-write it as some reviews have pointed out that it is out of character and going too fast. So I have decided to alter it and re-post. I am really sorry to the people who were enjoying it. But I hope you like it a bit better after I have fixed it. Cheers, guys. XD I also changed the title, personally, I like this one better._

**********

There were definitely a few things about angels that Dean Winchester was fairly certain about.

One; they had no sense of humour. That had come clearly when Castiel wasn't able to understand a joke Dean had made. He had just stared at him blankly, making Dean roll his eyes and want to forget he had said anything in the first place.

Two; they had no sense of personal space. Dean had realised this when they had been in Bobby's kitchen and Castiel told him he could throw him back into the pit without a moment's hesitation. It wasn't that Dean feared Castiel, but the closeness and the tone he used while he said this _made_ Dean fear this man, this angel, more than he had done in the short time he had known Castiel.

And three; they appeared out of nowhere, and, literally, made you shit yourself. Dean had encountered Castiel showing up out of nowhere many-a-time. In the Impala, the motel room, when he turned corners, Castiel was there, in the shower, even once when he was on the crapper, but Castiel didn't seem fazed, until Dean mentioned to him about using the front door.

That's what happened one night in motel room, when Dean got the shock of his life.

**********

Dean was sitting in the motel room by himself. Sammy had buggered off, no doubt, to be with that demon bitch, Ruby. He hated the thought of his brother with her. God knows what she was doing to him. He really didn't want to think about it. He was lazily flicking through TV channels. Not even any decent porn on TV. He switched it off and got up, heading to the bathroom to wash up. That was when the door went. Four short knocks. Dean sighed.

"Sammy, you should remember your key ..." Dean shouted, before moving over to open the door. He stopped short when he saw Castiel, leaning against the door frame in obvious pain, and tears in his eyes.

"Dean ..." he breathed out, with some effort, before he almost collapsed. Dean caught him as he fell forward. He did his best to lift him into his arms and carried him over to the bed. He laid him down on his back, earning a howl of pain from the angel and he rolled onto his side.

"Jesus, Cas. What the hell happened to you?" Dean asked, squatting down next to the bed to look into Castiel's eyes. That's when he noticed the blood on his shirt, trenchcoat, staining his tie and even his skin.

"Dean ... " Castiel breathed again. "I'm so happy to see you. I'm glad I found you ..." He spoke softly, in a weak voice.

"Cas, tell me what happened ... please?" Dean said. Castiel looked into Dean's eyes. He nodded and began to tell Dean what had happened.

----

_Castiel was sitting in a small park near the Winchester's motel when he was joined by another angel. He looked over at the other being._

"_Abdiel, what can I do for you?" he asked, looking back out to the children playing._

"_Father wishes you back to Heaven for the moment. Metatron and Zachariah are waiting for you. There is something they wish to discuss with you ..." Abdiel told him before he disappeared. Castiel sighed and vanished from his spot on the park bench._

_He was met by four stern looking angels as he arrived in Heaven. Two of them moved forward and grabbed Castiel by the arms, as Zachariah and Metatron walked away, the other angels dragging Castiel after them. He didn't struggle. He knew what was happening. He would have to be punished for helping Dean get rid of Lilith. _

_The two angels holding him pulled at his trenchcoat, jacket, shirt and tie until his chest was bare in front of the higher angels. _

"_You have disobeyed, Castiel," Metatron said. It wasn't a question. "You now have to be punished." Castiel watched as the two angels moved away and came back with whips, that almost seemed to glow. _

"_Hold him down," Zachariah said. He looked down at Castiel. His eyes almost said 'I'm sorry but I have to do this.' The two angels who had hold of Castiel held him down._

"_These wounds will be inflicted on your immortal soul, Castiel. Your vessel will suffer too ... then your grace will be taken from you and you will be left with human pain, human emotions. And you will never dark in Heaven's doorway again," Metatron said, unfurling the whip and taking a few practise shots at thin air before laying one hard lash of the whip along Castiel's back. The pain didn't hurt his vessel. It wouldn't until his grace was gone, but it seemed to travel below the skin and down into his angelic being. He could feel its mark on it. _

_More lashes came, over and over the space of half an hour, then an hour. His vessel was bleeding freely and his immortal soul was in agony. He was ready for another lash but it never came. He opened his eyes and looked up at the two powerful angels. _

"_That should be enough to teach you a lesson. Now you will suffer as a mortal," Metatron said. He grabbed Castiel by the chin and began chanting an incantation, making Castiel's eyes and mouth glow as his grace began to come away from his vessel. Castiel could feel himself become weaker; he could feel the pain on his vessel. Suddenly, his grace came free from the vessel, making Castiel almost scream with pain, and was contained in a little glass vial around Metatron's neck. He threw Castiel's shirt, jacket and trenchcoat back at the bleeding ... human. Castiel struggled to stand up to pull on his clothes, his vessel in pain and his eyes streaming at the vision of Heaven before his eyes. If he didn't get out of there soon, he would lose his sight. Humans couldn't look upon an angel's true being or Heaven._

"_You'll learn human pain, Castiel. You are a sinner, and know nothing of obedience," Metatron spat. "I never want to see you again." _

_The next thing Castiel knew he was in an alleyway near the Winchester's motel room. He got up from where he was on the ground and he moved towards Dean's room, as fast as the pain would allow him to move. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he moved, his eyes burning and his back bleeding. He knocked on Dean's door._

----

"Jesus, Cas," Dean said. There was a hell of a lot of blood on the back of Castiel's trenchcoat. "Cas, let me see." The angel – ex angel – was reluctant but he eventually got up, with a little help from Dean, and he stripped off his trenchcoat, his suit jacket. The back of his white shirt was caked in blood. It was sticking to his back and painful to pull off. It eventually came away and Dean's eyes widened at the sight. There were at least a hundred, maybe more, large gashes across Castiel's back, most overlapping each other. There was also two large bleeding slits, completely vertical, one just underneath each shoulder blade. Dean assumed that was where Castiel's wings would have been.

"What happened to your wings?" Dean said. Castiel closed his eyes.

"They were cut off," was all he said. His voice gave away his emotions, something that had never happened before with Cas.

"Sit down, and don't move," Dean said, before moving to the bathroom and running the bath, making sure the water was alright for Castiel to get into without causing himself any more pain. He could see the pain in Castiel's face playing over and over again. He was broken from her thoughts when he heard Castiel sobbing in the bedroom.

"Cas, come in here," Dean said. He waited a moment and Castiel came hobbling into the bathroom, wincing in pain, tears staining his cheeks. Dean knelt down and he unlaced Castiel's shoes and removed them and his socks.

"Can you take off your trousers?" Dean asked, noticing the pain in Castiel's face. He managed to get his belt and button undone but he couldn't bend down to lower his trousers. Dean noticed this and he did it for him, trying to ignore the heat rising in his cheeks, as the angel – man – in front of him was almost naked. He quickly took off Cas' boxers for him and helped him into the bath. He winced and a tear slid down his cheek, as his sore back was touched by the hot water. He drew his knees up to his chest and he rested his chin on his knees. Dean grabbed a wash cloth from the sink and he rolled up his jeans to his knees and took off his shoes and socks, before sitting on the ledge at the back of the bath, with his feet in the water.

He dipped the cloth into the water and touched it to Castiel's back, who whimpered in pain.

"So you're human now?"

Castiel nodded. "I am."

"I'm sorry, Castiel. It's my fault." Dean washed at Castiel's back, wincing himself at the sight of the injuries.

"No, Dean. I was instructed not to help you, but I did. I did it off my own back, not because you asked. Don't ever blame yourself," Castiel said. "I am sorry you have to see me like this."

"No, Cas. I want to help you."

**********

Soon, Castiel was cleaned, bandaged and was sitting on Dean's bed wearing a Metallica t-shirt and some sweatpants. In Dean's opinion, he looked positively adorable in the slightly oversized clothes. _Ok, I did not just say 'adorable.'_

"You take my bed, Cas. I'll take Sammy's. Somehow I don't think he'll be home tonight," Dean said. Cas tilted his head a little.

"Dean, do you believe in fate?"

Dean thought for a moment. Sometimes he did, other times, no he didn't. "Why?"

"I just wondered if you thought that fate brought us together. You and I," Castiel asked. "I know getting you out of Hell doesn't really count as fate, but I think it was." Dean looked confused at this sudden revelation.

"Cas ... I don't understand what you are trying to say," he said, sitting down on the bed, next to Castiel, who turned to look at him with his bluer-than-blue eyes. He waited on Cas' explanation. But it never came.

He kissed Dean instead. "I love you, Dean," he whispered.

Dean was shocked, not responding to the kiss. He pushed Castiel back, surprising the smaller man. "Don't, Cas," he said. Castiel's brow furrowed, and he tilted his head in that confused way of his.

"What is the matter, Dean?" Castiel asked. Dean stood up, his hand raking through his hair. He laughed, a low, mocking laugh.

"Castiel ..." he said, shocking Cas at the use of his full name. "You can't go around kissing other men and telling them you love them like that. It's not right. You can't kiss me, and expect me to kiss you back." Castiel looked down at his feet, hurt at Dean's words.

"I'm sorry, Dean. I did not know you felt this way ..." he said. Dean moved over to him.

"Cas, listen. You are my friend. But that's it. Whatever feelings you have for me, I cannot return them. I don't love you. I'm sorry ..." he said. Castiel was still looking at his own feet.

"I understand," he said. He moved onto the bed and got under the sheets, pulling them up to his chin, facing away from the other bed, away from Dean. Dean sighed deeply, and pulled off his clothes before getting into the other bed. He pulled the sheets up, a tear sliding down his cheek before he fell asleep, dreams of Hell plaguing his mind once again.

* * *

_Okay guys, I thought about going for the 'Dean doesn't return Cas' feelings and makes Cas upset' route, as I realised that the relationship in 'This Fire In My Skin' was too fast in the first chapter. So I hope you like the alterations. Sorry again for people who were liking the story. Hope you like this version better. XD_


	2. Chapter 2

**Soon, It Won't Be Just Pretend**

**Summary:** _1st in my human!Castiel series. Dean finds Castiel injured, and does his best to help him. But when the angel confesses his love for the hunter, how will Dean react to the admission? Dean/Castiel eventually, boy kissing._

**A/N**: _Sorry if there is any out of characterness ... italics are flashbacks. I also will be adding some angels into the story. I've done research on names and meanings, but if anything is wrong, let me know. Thanks x_

**A/N #2**: _This story is also 'This Fire In My Skin' but I have decided to re-write it as some reviews have pointed out that it is out of character and going too fast. So I have decided to alter it and re-post. I am really sorry to the people who were enjoying it. But I hope you like it a bit better after I have fixed it. Cheers, guys. XD I also changed the title, personally, I like this one better._

**********

**Chapter 2**

When Dean awoke the next morning and rolled over to look at Castiel, he found an empty bed. He sat up in his own bed and wondered if last night had been a dream, if he had imagined his ex-angel confessing his love for him, and if he had imagined knocking him back. He sighed and lay back in bed.

"Dean?"

Dean's eyes opened again when he heard Castiel's voice. He looked up and saw Castiel in the doorway to the bathroom, shirt off, showing off the bandage that was wrapped around his body.

"I am bleeding again." Dean got out of bed and he followed Castiel into the bathroom. He sat down on the closed toilet seat and he began to unwrap the bandages. Castiel winced and gasped a few times as the blood caused the gauze to stick to his wounds. He picked up a cloth and began to clean it again. The two of them stood in silence as Dean worked on cleaning up the other man. Castiel was the first one to break the silence.

"I want to apologise, Dean," Castiel said. Dean sighed.

"Cas, listen. It's fine ..."

"No, it's not, Dean. I did something I thought was right, but it wasn't. I am sorry, and I won't do it again," Castiel said. Dean heard the emotion in the other man's voice. Castiel truly loved him. Dean could see it in his eyes when they had spoken about it the night before. But he couldn't allow himself to love Castiel. He was an angel, an ex-angel even, but it was still wrong. He continued to clean up Castiel's back. The wounds oozed blood, making them really hard to keep clean. Dean sighed gently again, as he ran the cloth over the wounds. He picked up a new bandage and wrapped it around Castiel again. This was when Sam chose to return to the motel room.

"Dean?" he called from the bedroom. "You here?"

"The bathroom, Sammy," he said. Sam walked in and was shocked to see Dean and Castiel there, Castiel covered in bandages and bleeding.

"What happened?"

******

Castiel was asleep in bed again. He was catching up on everything he had missed as an angel, and sleep was a main priority. Dean and Sam sat at the table in the corner, Sam on his laptop and Dean eating a candy bar he had found in his bag.

"So his grace has been taken from him?" Sam asked. "That's horrible." Dean snorted.

"That's nothing. They whipped him to within an inch of his life, and cut off his wings," Dean said. "And we thought angels were the good guys." Sam frowned, his brow furrowing.

"He's human now then?" Sam asked, looking over at Castiel. Dean nodded.

"Yup. And he can't go back to Illinois," Dean said. "Not after what happened with Amelia and Claire. Amelia would probably tell him to go to Hell. It's not like he's Jimmy, anyway. He's still Cas." Sam nodded in understanding. They both sat in silence for a few minutes, apart from the chewing coming from Dean. Sam broke the silence.

"Found us a job, Dean ..."Sam said, turning his laptop round to show Dean a newspaper article snippet on the screen. "Five kids have all disappeared in the last two weeks in Wisconsin. One woman ended up in hospital when she saw the abduction of one of the children. She said the abductor had black eyes, and not like the 'I've-just-been-beaten-up' kind, before he attacked her." Dean looked up at his brother.

"Looks like we got us a job," he said, with a grin. He looked over at the bed, where Castiel was asleep, curled up under the duvet, his hair sticking up in all directions. Sam looked over at the fallen angel too, before looking back at Dean.

"You like him, don't you?" Dean looked at Sammy, with a frown.

"What the hell, dude? Why are you talking such crap? I do not 'like him' ... we're just friends ..." he said. Sam smiled at how defensive Dean was being.

"If you say so," he said. Dean glared at his brother, but didn't answer him.

"We better get him up. Since he fell, he's been catching up on more sleep than anything."Dean said, moving over to the bed and he shook Castiel gently. Cas groaned and he rolled over, before opening his eyes, meeting Dean's eyes.

"Come on, Cas. Hunting job. You've slept most of the day ..." Dean said,

"Okay, I'm up ..." he said, eyes moving from Dean's, swinging his legs out of bed, before gathering his clothes and moving to the bathroom.

"Do you think he's ready to hunt?" Sam asked. Dean looked at his brother, confused.

"Why wouldn't he be?"

"Because he's human now. He can't smite the sons of bitches anymore, Dean," the younger Winchester pointed out.

"It's okay, Sammy. He has us ..."

******

After a long drive to Wisconsin, Dean, Cas and Sam all entered the hospital, where the old woman, who had seen the abduction, was being kept. Sam had made Castiel up a fake ID before they had left the motel. Castiel had on his suit and tie, minus the trenchcoat, the same as the Winchester's.

"Right ..." Sam said. "I'll go speak to the nurse. You two go question the woman." Dean and Castiel nodded, and headed for the room. They knocked on the door, and moved in. The old woman was lying in the hospital bed. She had a nasty gash on her head, stitched up and plastered up. Her left arm was in a sling, and her right wrist was bandaged.

"Mrs ... Adler ..." Dean said, looking at his notes, before smiling at the old woman. "I'm Detective Thomas, and this is Detective Jones." They held up their badges for the woman to see. "We'd like to talk to you about what happened to you." The woman groaned.

"I have already spoken to the police."

"We know, Madam, but this is routine. We are from a different department ..." Dean said. The woman sighed and nodded. Castiel turned to the woman.

"Can you describe what happened?"

"Well, I was taking my dog for a walk. I was turning the corner into my neighbourhood. I got closer to my house and there was a man standing in my neighbour's front yard, with my neighbour's son. Suddenly, a cloud of black smoke came and it moved down the child's throat. I shouted out and the man came at me, his eyes black, and he attacked me. He broke my arm, my wrist ... I have cuts and bruises everywhere. Then he disappeared, with the child." She was almost crying as Dean wrote down everything she was telling them. Castiel took the woman's hand gently in his own.

"It's alright, you're safe now," he said, feeling terribly sorry for this woman. Dean decided they should leave.

"Thank you for your time. We hope you get better soon," Dean said, with a sympathetic smile.

"Thank you. Get well, soon," Castiel said to her as they walked out of the room. "So, what do we do?" Castiel asked Dean as they moved to find Sam.

"We go check out the neighbourhood. If it was a demon, we should be able to find some clues," Dean said. "Come on, let's find Sammy."

* * *

_I hope it's going goo for you so far. If you are reading this you must like it ... XD_


	3. Chapter 3

**Soon, It Won't Be Just Pretend**

**Summary:** _1st in my human!Castiel series. Dean finds Castiel injured, and does his best to help him. But when the angel confesses his love for the hunter, how will Dean react to the admission? Dean/Castiel eventually, boy kissing._

**A/N**: _Sorry if there is any out of characterness ... italics are flashbacks. I also will be adding some angels into the story. I've done research on names and meanings, but if anything is wrong, let me know. Thanks x_

**A/N #2**: _This story is also 'This Fire In My Skin' but I have decided to re-write it as some reviews have pointed out that it is out of character and going too fast. So I have decided to alter it and re-post. I am really sorry to the people who were enjoying it. But I hope you like it a bit better after I have fixed it. Cheers, guys. XD I also changed the title, personally, I like this one better._

**********

**Chapter 3**

"This is the neighbourhood," Sam said from the front seat of the Impala, looking down at the map he had in his hand. Dean parked up and he, Sam and Castiel all jumped out.

"Does look a bit creepy," Dean said, moving to the back of the car and opening the trunk, passing out guns and flashlights to both Sam and Cas, before he picked up his own and they moved down the street slowly. A couple of the houses had lights on, casting some light out onto the darkened street.

"Okay, Sammy you go check the neighbour's house. Cas and I will go to Mrs Adler's house. Cas will go round the back and I'll go in the front. Let's go ..." he said, and they all moved to where they were meant to be going, cocking their guns on the way.

Sam moved to the neighbour's house quietly, trailing his hand over windowsills and brickwork, searching for traces of sulphur. Dean and Cas moved to Mrs Adler's house, finding the door unlocked. Dean nodded to Castiel, who quickly moved around the back of the house, flashlight shining in front of him. He was a little scared that he might bump into a demon. He would have to use the gun, as he had no angel mojo. He opened the back door and slipped inside, into the dark kitchen. There was a strange smell that suddenly filled his nostrils. A smell he recognised. Sulphur. There had been a demon in here, or there was a demon nearby.

A creak of the floorboards stopped him in his tracks. It sounded like it had come from above his head. He flattened himself against the wall and moved along the kitchen to the door. He pulled it open quickly and almost jumped out of his skin when he came face to face with Dean.

"Don't do that," Dean said in a hushed whisper, holding his hand to his heart, waiting for his heartbeat to go back to normal.

"Sorry," Castiel said. "I didn't mean to startle you." Dean breathed out deeply.

"You check upstairs, I'll check the rest of this floor," he said. Cas nodded and he headed for the staircase. Dean moved about in the living room, running his hand along the coffee table. He could smell the sulphur on his hand when he pulled it away. The demon had to be nearby. He moved across the room to another door and opened it, which took him outside to the garage. There in the middle of the floor was a trapdoor. There was a rug over the top, but it was folded over, as if someone had moved it. Dean made his way over to it. He knelt down and opened it, shining his torch down. He stepped onto the ladder and made his way down.

It took him down into a dark cellar. He shone the flashlight around until it settled on a cage in the corner. A cage filled with the missing children from the neighbourhood. He moved over to it and peered inside. The children seemed to be asleep, apart from a little girl in the corner. Dean put a finger to his lips and gave her a comforting smile. But she suddenly opened her mouth and screamed, pointing behind Dean. Dean turned before he was, suddenly, thrown against the wall by a demon. He managed to get up, but the demon pinned him to the wall with his mojo.

"Who are you?" Dean asked.

"I am Asmodai," the demon answered. "There is no need for introductions, you know. I already know who you are. Dean Winchester, the man who strolled from the pit. Tell me, how did a mere mortal walk from the pits of hell, from the clutches of Alistair, to walk among humans once again?" Dean smiled.

"I like to think it's because I'm adorable," he said, grinning, sarcastically. Asmodai let out a laugh.

"You are big-headed. Just like I'd heard from Alistair," he said. Dean glared at Asmodai. He hoped that Sam, or Castiel, would come and find him soon.

"You know, Alistair did speak highly of you, on occasion. You were a skilled torturer I hear," he said, sitting down on a chair next to the cage of children.

"I did what I had to do. I didn't want to be tortured. So it was torture or be tortured. You know the drill," Dean said. "I took it for thirty years. I couldn't do it anymore. Do you know how painful ... how much of it I took?"

"I did. Because I was the one who sent Alistair to make you change your mind. I made him hurt you, make you feel the pains of hell, to see if you would help us torture. How did we know that you would be dragged out of hell by an angel, who, sadly, is now a poor excuse," Asmodai said. Dean glared.

"You leave Cas out of this. It's not his fault he fell. It was mine. I asked for help which he was not allowed to give, and he gave it ... I didn't know he would get ass reamed in heaven and fall ..." Dean yelled, trying to unpin himself from the wall.

"Aww, the fallen angel has a nickname ... how sweet. I think I may shed a tear ..." Asmodai mocked. "Tell me, how's the demon boy, Samuel?" Dean felt rage bubbling in the pit of his stomach.

"He's fine, thanks very much," came Sam's voice from behind Asmodai. The demon turned to face Sam. Sam moved forward and punched Asmodai, who was knocked back. He stood back up and spat blood from his mouth. His attention came away from Dean, who dropped to the floor. Asmodai punched Sam, first in the jaw, then in the stomach. Sam doubled over in pain before he managed to collect his gun again. Just as Asmodai came towards him, he let off a gunshot, which hit the demon in the chest. Asmodai looked down at the hole in his chest, before looking at Sam.

"That stings a bit," he said, with a menacing grin.

"Hope this is worse ..." Sam said, raising a hand to exorcise the demon. He watched as Asmodai's hand went to his throat as if he was choking, his eyes, well, his vessel's eyes, rolled back in his head, as the black smoke began to come out of his mouth and nose. He coughed and fell to his knees, his vessel twitching as the demon force came away from it. The vessel of the young man he had been possessing fell to the ground, in an unconscious state, as the black smoke disappeared around their feet. Sam looked over at Dean, who was giving him a disapproving look. Sam avoided his eyes, looking at the cage.

"We gotta get them out," Sam said. "There might be more demons lurking." Dean nodded, and began hitting the lock with the butt of his gun until it came away from the metal door.

"Where's Cas?" Sam asked.

"He was checking upstairs last time I saw him," Dean said. "It's okay. We'll get him once we get the kids out." They opened the cage and helped all five children out. Dean picked up a little girl, who was finding it difficult to walk after being in the cage for so long.

"Sammy, get that window open," Dean said. Sam moved over and broke the glass of the window, and began helping the kids out.

"That's why he attacked Mrs Adler. He needed to hide the kids in her cellar. She would have found out," Dean said.

"Sick bastard," Sam said. They got the last child out before they climbed out themselves. They got all the kids to the sidewalk and checked them quickly for injuries.

"I'm going to get Cas," Dean said, running towards the house. But, suddenly, he was knocked back when the force of an explosion ripped through the house. He landed awkwardly on the grass, his arm painful as he attempted to get up. His ears were ringing. He saw the state of the house once his eyes came back into focus, and panic immediately set in. _Please say Cas got out._

Dean stood and he moved towards the burning house. "CAS!" he yelled, but Sam and another man from the neighbourhood grabbed him by the arms and pulled him away from the burning building.

"No, my friend is in there," Dean shouted. "Let me go!

"Dean, get back," Sam said, pulling him away.

"Cas!! CAS!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Soon, It Won't Be Just Pretend**

**Summary:** _1st in my human!Castiel series. Dean finds Castiel injured, and does his best to help him. But when the angel confesses his love for the hunter, how will Dean react to the admission? Dean/Castiel eventually, boy kissing._

**A/N**: _Sorry if there is any out of characterness ... italics are flashbacks. I also will be adding some angels into the story. I've done research on names and meanings, but if anything is wrong, let me know. Thanks x_

**A/N #2**: _This story is also 'This Fire In My Skin' but I have decided to re-write it as some reviews have pointed out that it is out of character and going too fast. So I have decided to alter it and re-post. I am really sorry to the people who were enjoying it. But I hope you like it a bit better after I have fixed it. Cheers, guys. XD I also changed the title, personally, I like this one better._

**********

**Chapter 4**

"Cas!!" Dean shouted once more, before pulling free of Sam. He ran to the house, desperate to get his friend out. He could just make out the sirens, as his ears were still ringing from the noise of the explosion. He could hear Sam calling for him, to come back, but he ignored him. He ran through the burning doorway, in search of Cas. Castiel had only been human two days, and Dean had let him come to harm already. Dean took off his coat and held it to his face to prevent him inhaling the smoke.

"Cas!" he called, through the crackling of the flames and his own coughing. He made his way through the house as quickly as he could, flames licking at his skin, leaving burn marks on him. His chest felt restricted as the smoke filled his lungs. He choked on the taste and smell, as he climbed the stairs to look for Castiel. He checked all the rooms as quickly as he could until he saw the smaller man trapped underneath some debris that had fallen from the roof. He looked up, to see the roof almost about to cave in under the flames. He had to get Castiel out fast. He moved the debris as fast as his aching arms would allow. Castiel was bleeding from various parts of his face, his arms, back. His wounds from his punishment were oozing fresh blood. He was a mess. Dean managed to free him. He moved over to the shattered window and looked out. Sam was down there, with paramedics and the fire department.

"Is there someone in here?" came a voice from within the house. One of the fire department, hopefully.

"In here," Dean yelled, his voice hoarse, as he checked Castiel's pulse. He was alive. Just. Two firemen ran into the room, seeing Dean and Castiel there. Dean was shielding Castiel from falling debris, as if he didn't care about what happened to himself.

"We're here now, you have to get out. This house is going to collapse ..." the fireman said. He helped Dean up, but Dean didn't want to leave the ex-angel.

"We'll get him out," the fireman said. Dean gave one last look at Cas before the other fireman by the door ushered him out. He was led downstairs and out the door and back to Sam. He collapsed onto the ground from the smoke inhalation. He managed to open his eyes again to see Castiel being carried out by the fireman and put onto a stretcher. The paramedics rushed him into the ambulance, patching up his cuts and bruises, giving him more oxygen to help him breathe.

"You better come too," one paramedic said. "You don't look in a fit state." Dean turned to Sam.

"I'll bring the Impala to the hospital. I'll follow," he said. Dean nodded and he was led to the ambulance. He sat beside Castiel's stretcher as a paramedic handed him an oxygen mask. He placed it to his face and felt relief as he breathed. He reached over and took Castiel's hand, a gesture that was not missed by Sam as the ambulance doors closed.

**********

The low beeping of the monitors in the hospital ward was enough to give anyone a headache. Dean stood in the doorway of Castiel's room, watching the ex-angel. The only way Dean knew Castiel was alive, was that annoying beeping. He sighed deeply. He had let the smaller man come to harm, dragged him on a hunt when Sam told him that he wasn't ready. He felt awful. He moved over to Castiel's bed and sat down next to him. There was an oxygen mask over his face and tubes coming out of his arms. Dean had to do his best not to shed any tears. He reached out with his good hand – the hand that wasn't bandaged up – and he took Castiel's, his skin warm against Castiel's cool skin.

"I'm sorry. Cas. I thought you were ready for hunting. I was wrong ..." Dean said. He stroked his thumb over the back of Castiel's hand. He watched for any signs of life on his face, but none came. He lay there, silent and still. Dean wanted to speak to him, to tell him he was sorry for everything, for rejecting him, for hurting his feelings, for making him think he didn't love him when really, deep down, he did. He was so focused on Castiel, that Dean didn't notice Sam come into the room until the younger Winchester cleared his throat.

"Coffee?" Sam asked. Dean smiled slightly at Sam.

"Thanks," he said, but didn't take it. Sam sighed and put it down on the table next to Castiel's bed. Then he looked at the fallen angel.

"He'll be okay, Dean," Sam said. Dean nodded, but Sam wasn't convinced that Dean thought the same. Dean reached over and ran his fingers through Castiel's hair, making it stick up at all angles, like it usually did.

"Dude, why didn't you tell me you felt like this?" Sam said. "I knew you liked him." Dean looked over at his brother, who sat at the other side of Castiel's bed, before he looked back down at Castiel.

"Sam, I'm not gay. It's not men, seriously. It's only him, dude. Just him. No one else," Dean said. "I rejected him because I didn't know my own feelings. And I hurt him, Sammy. You didn't see his face. He was so hurt. I caused that," Dean said, holding Castiel's hand again. "I've done this to him, Sammy. I should have listened to you. He wasn't ready. Now, he could die and it's my fault."

"Dean, it's not your fault. He wanted to come on the hunt. You didn't plant a bomb in that house, so I don't see how you could take blame," Sam said. Dean watched his brother for a moment, taking in what he had said. It was true, but Dean still blamed himself. His eyes rested on Castiel's peaceful and content face. Sam spoke up again.

"I'm gonna go call Bobby. Tell him the situation. Then I'll go get some dinner. Be back later," he said, squeezing Dean's shoulder affectionately before he left the room. Dean sighed and looked back at the ex-angel.

"I love you, Castiel."

**********

Dean awoke, his neck stiff and the muscles in his bad screaming out in protest. He was in the chair next to Castiel's bed, head on the bed. He sighed, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He suddenly heard a small groan, and his eyes snapped open, looking at Castiel.

"Cas?" he asked. The ex-angel began to move his head in the direction of the voice, his eyelids fluttering. "Cas, you hear me?" The smaller man's eyes cracked open slightly. The light of the room hurt them, and everything was out of focus. He mumbled something but Dean couldn't make it out. Until he did it again, and he heard the small 'Dean.'

"Yeah, Cas. It's me," Dean said, not able to keep the smile off of his face. Castiel's eyes finally came into focus, finally resting on Dean's face. His face seemed to soften as he reached up slowly to removed the oxygen mask from his mouth.

"You're here," he said, in a small, but usually gruff voice.

"Where else would I be?" Dean asked, sitting on the edge of the bed next to Castiel, taking his hand. "How are you feeling?"

"I have never felt so awful in my life. But I feel better after seeing you," Castiel said. Dean smiled and hesitated, before reaching out to touch Castiel's cheek. No one noticed Sam outside the door. They were too wrapped up in each other.

"Castiel, I want to apologise, for the other day in the motel room," Dean said, but Castiel put a finger to the hunter's lips.

"No need to apologise," Castiel said. "It's in the past."

"No, I want to apologise ..." he paused, before speaking again. "... because I lied." Castiel put on that adorable – _yes, adorable_ – confused face of his.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I do love you, Castiel. I just didn't want to admit it," Dean said. Castiel's face was a picture of happiness.

"Really?" he asked. Dean nodded.

"Always," he said before he moved down to kiss the ex-angel. Castiel's bandaged hand came up to rest on Dean's cheek, a stray tear sliding down his cheek and mingling with their kiss. Sam smiled from the doorway. He'd better leave them to it.

* * *

_Just the epilogue to go kids. Hope you like this chapter. Remember and review. Feedback is always goooood. XD_


	5. Epilogue

**Soon, It Won't Be Just Pretend**

**Summary:** _1st in my human!Castiel series. Dean finds Castiel injured, and does his best to help him. But when the angel confesses his love for the hunter, how will Dean react to the admission? Dean/Castiel eventually, boy kissing._

**A/N**: _Sorry if there is any out of characterness ... italics are flashbacks. I also will be adding some angels into the story. I've done research on names and meanings, but if anything is wrong, let me know. Thanks x_

**A/N #2**: _This story is also 'This Fire In My Skin' but I have decided to re-write it as some reviews have pointed out that it is out of character and going too fast. So I have decided to alter it and re-post. I am really sorry to the people who were enjoying it. But I hope you like it a bit better after I have fixed it. Cheers, guys. XD I also changed the title, personally, I like this one better._

**********

**Epilogue**

"Open your eyes," Dean said, to Castiel, who was standing in the middle of a street in Lawrence, Kansas. Castiel obliged and he opened them, looking up at a house.

"It's a house," Castiel said.

"It's not just any house, Cas. It was, well, is the Winchester family home. After the last people moved out, no one wanted to live here because they think it's haunted. So me and Sam bought it, or should I say the agents were very happy to get a haunted house off their lists. It's for the three of us to live," Dean said, grinning like an idiot. "You are a human; we are helping you experience a human life. Sure, we'll go hunting, but at least we'll have a home to come back to." Dean smiled at Cas and moved forward, taking him in his arms.

"I don't know what to say, Dean," Castiel said, with a smile. Dean rested a forehead against the ex-angel's.

"Say you'll live here with me, and let me be the pain in your ass for many years to come," Dean said, pressing a chaste kiss to Castiel's lips. Castiel's eyes fluttered closed as he kissed Dean back. He smiled into the kiss. He had never felt like he had a family before, but now, he really did have one.

"Yes, Dean," Castiel said when they pulled back. "I'll live with you."

**********

Night had fallen and all was still and quiet, apart from the giggling and talking coming from a certain hunter and former angel. Dean and Castiel were lying across the hood of the Impala as Castiel pointed out beautiful constellations of stars in the sky. Their hands were clasped in between them as they lay side by side, outside their new home. Sam had gone to bed, but Castiel had said he wanted to see the stars from a human's point of view.

"I love you, Dean," Castiel said, watching the hunter from where he was. Dean turned to face him, smiling brightly.

"I'm just irresistible," he teased. Castiel just laughed – a wonderful sound to Dean's ears – before he moved closer to the hunter. He pressed a small kiss to the tip of Dean's nose before he pressed a passionate one to the hunter's lips.

"You'll look after me, won't you?" Castiel asked, against the hunter's lips. Dean moaned into the kiss gently.

"Always."

* * *

_Okay, so that's this one done. I hope you guys liked it. XD The #2 in my human!Castiel series will be started now. I hope you all liked and feedback would be awesome. XD, love you guys! xx_


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